I Was Needed
by milliejay
Summary: Episode 8 for Gene Hunt's POV...


**I Was Needed**

Ashes To Ashes

Gene's POV, the relationship between him and Alex and what happened the day that The Price's died.

Rated T

Bolly Knicker's has come back to us tonight. As I raised my glass, I saw the light of life return to her eyes. I saw her real smile break through the pain, that I could see in her face, my friend had returned to me. Tonight I watched her shyly bask in the celebration of the life that she saved, her copper family truly embraced her tonight, they love her now and she deserves it.

I have missed her lately, she had been slipping away from me, withdrawing into her own private world. It seemed to start after I had saved her life. In the days that followed she changed, just when we seemed to be getting closer. She became a bundle of mixed signals and a heap of trouble. Shit she created so much trouble for me. She risked my job, my department and my blood pressure, she became a bloody nightmare to be frank. She was arrogant too, which is saying something coming from me.

I had thought that Bolly and I had an unspoken agreement that acknowledged the attraction between us. In began when Alex punched me in the face. Christ that hurt.

Filled with wine we were a breath away from a kiss but chivillary kicked in and she shagged a "Thatcherite Wanker."

In my office the next morning we both knew that I could have had her that night and she was disappointed. But I don't want a drunken shag and an embarrassing morning after. The Gene Genie, hard arsed DCI that I am wants it to happen without any regrets, I really do like her.

We became friends after that night, very good friends that beautiful, strange, posh bird and I. She is refreshing company after those nights drinking with Ray and Chris.

Alex is engaging, funny and the right amount of tarty to gain my interest. She will never back down from a fight, she defies my anger, she has a healthy ego and very good copper's nouce too. Underneath is a woman who is really hurting, that seems to crave acceptance and a woman with a big heart.

When she first started to drift away, I blamed it on that Evan White, he is much more her type and I had stupidly told her to stay away from him, I could see her being charmed by him. The more she drifted the more she seemed to be trying to shut her feelings for me down but I saw something show when she said yes to my invitation for dinner. I carried on with my crude Gene Hunt approach, it is part of the game we play, though I hoped dinner would be a chance to show our hands, when she told me she was leaving my heart faltered but my bravado stayed in place.

This woman Alex, has captured something in me. This woman that I have walked through breaking glass for, that I have held as I sat frightened for me life in an airless vault, that drove me to make an arse of myself on national television and get a bollocking from my bosses. I have defended her at my own cost while the team was mutinous with her when she had me removed from the Gil Hollis case, excites me.

It more that bruised my ego to hear her tell me that I am not real and confused the hell out of me when she called me fictitious. She was falling deeper inside her own head, she seemed able to blindly trample on me and my things as though I am impervious to heartache, then maybe everybody thinks that about me. She had reported me to the enemy, to Evan White but I saw the guilt as Caroline dressed me down, she knew I was hurt as well as betrayed and still I could only postpone dinner because I knew that the woman I care about was still in there somewhere, I felt her warmth as I shielded her from Hollis who tried to shot us, I felt in her touch.

Last night we did it, we had dinner together. An event marred by her insistence that she was leaving today. Where she thought see was going I had no idea.

She was beautiful, Christ she was really beautiful and funny and typically strange last night. We teased each other, both of us working hard to cover our true feelings, as she slipped further away, though I did catch the sad, look of regret when she turned down my earnest suggestion of watching a film at her flat upstairs.

This morning it was her wild fury that shocked me the most. Tim and Caroline Price had to be released, Alex had nearly cost me my department with that stunt.

I was shaken to see sudden tears in her eyes, not by her very public angry and insubordination as fear seemed to eat her up. I took her to find Evan and then to the school, she was unravelling fast. All I knew was that I had to be with her and do as she asked.

The blue escort exploded just as Alex had told us it would, yet I was unprepared for the true horror. Little Alexandra Price became an orphan before her own eyes, her little life ruined in the flames, by the sad, sordid lives of her parents. I did the only thing that I could do, I scoped her up and carried her to my car while she trembled, too deeply shocked to cry. She crawled in to the backseat of my Quattro, as the air was filled with screams. Screams that tore through me because I knew they came from my Alex. I saw a teacher or two approaching and Evan blindly stumbling towards the car. I took off my coat and covered the little girl with it, she lay curled tight in a ball. I then called Ray and wanted for Evan to watch over the child.

The stench of burning oil and flesh surrounded me as I ran to get my Alex. She was on her knees, shaking on the ground. I called her name and helped her to her feet. As she turned to face me and I saw the tears. I put my arms around her tight and I let her cry.

With her hand over my heart she cried tears that I could not sooth, she sobbed like a little girl, tears of grief that seemed to have been buried deep inside of her. When Ray and Chris arrived, I continued to hold her, a glare from me told them of the shit they would be in, if they so much as teased Bolly. I was pleasantly surprised when Chris gently took her hand and lead her away as the heavy tears died down, allowing me to do my job.

Alex cried a steady flow of silent tears in my office, shed without shame as the truth came out. Nothing could have stopped a man who had crossed in to cold, calm insanity from an act of madness. He took his life and killed his wife and he destroyed two more lives. Evan White, who will forever blighted with guilt and Alexandra Price who escaped murder today, whose grief is already locked up too tight. I felt my own hardened voice break a little, when I spoke to her. I hope to God that she will be alright and if she ever needs me, I hope she will find me.


End file.
